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You don’t have to be marketing online for long before you declare at least once that all of your customers are “morons!”

In corner number one we have the disgruntled customer that is going to sue you over a $17 product.

In corner number two we have the customer who insists you are a scam artists and is determined to see you brought to justice (this is my personal favorite).

It doesn’t happen often, but if you’re going to be in business, you will run across some nasty customers from time to time. Some can be diffused, some can’t. That’s just the way things go in business.

There are some simple techniques for dealing with irate customers without burning yourself an ulcer over them or stooping to their level and telling them you hope they get cancer and die!

Here are some tips you may find useful…

1. Don’t take it personal

There is one thing that almost all nasty customers have in common. They try to attack you on a personal level. Name calling is not unusual. When you take it personal, you are likely to get into a yelling match with the customer which resolves nothing and only stands to make things worse. Try to diffuse the situation – kill the anger with kindness so to speak. If that doesn’t work, ask them to contact you again once they have calmed down and are willing to speak reasonably. Refuse to speak with a customer in an irate state. You don’t have to put up with abuse ever.

2. Don’t overdo the “customer is always right” concept

In customer service training you will always hear that the customer is always right. While that is true to some extent, sometimes they are just flat wrong. You should always try to accommodate a customer within reason, but do not allow that concept to go too far.

3. Realize it isn’t always your problem

Sometimes people just have a bad day and are looking for someone to take it out on. A hateful, ugly customer is often one of these people. If you listen to their ranting and raving, then respond kindly telling them you understand their frustration and you want to work with them to come to a resolution, you will often diffuse the anger and uncover the rational human being beneath it.

4. Don’t fall for fear invoking bluffs

In customer service some business people tend to do anything to avoid the potential harm of a threat even if it means losing money or giving in to irrational demands. When you are threatened, consider the validity of the threat. Do you really think someone is going to pay thousands of dollars in attorney fees to sue you over a low dollar transaction? Likely not. Again, do what you can to accommodate within reason but don’t give in to unsubstantiated threats.

5. Be prepared to decide whether or not a customer relationship is worth salvaging

You’ve heard it said that one happy customer tells one person about your business while an unhappy customer will tell 10 or more. Undoubtedly, word of mouth can be the best or the worst exposure for your business. This is the very basis of the “the customer is always right” concept. Of course it is best to salvage a customer relationship if you can, but again, do so within reason.

When I was younger, my best friend had a basement stocked full of spam. His family practically lived on it. The moment I walked into his house, the sickening aroma of spam filled the air.

When I was the ripe old age of twelve, I made the mistake of my life…I tried a spam-wich. My friend convinced me that it was “better than Mcdonalds!”

In my defense, I was starving and there was nothing else to eat. That moment in time still continues to haunt me.

This wouldn’t be my first nightmarish encounter with spam, however.

Ten years later, while building my very first Website, I naively put my email address on every single page of my site.

I wanted to give my visitors a chance to ask me questions, make comments on my site, etc.

As my Website grew more and more popular, I started to receive 100 spam emails a day. Then 500, 1000, 2000…until it became unbearable.

I needed a solution and fast.

The first thing I had to accept was that my old email address was now useless. So I had to give it a proper burial and let it go. Then I created a new email address and applied spam prevention techniques I had diligently researched.

The result? A spam free email account.

Let me tell you, it is total bliss my friend.

You are in a war. You vs. the enemy (Spammers). The war has swung to the other side, but by using guerilla warfare tactics, you can turn the tide of battle.

To win the ever growing battle against spammers, you have to study your enemy, then prepare your battle plan.

This may be the most important sentence you ever read about spam prevention, so pay attention - Spammers cannot fill your inbox with their junk if they can’t find your email.

It really is that simple.

With that in mind, below you will find your battle plan:

Step 1: Say good-bye to your old email account

If your inbox is filled with spam, dump it. I know using a new email address can be painful, but in the end you will be happy you took this advice.

Once the spammers find your email, you will never be able to regain full control of your inbox.

Step 2: Create a ‘dummy’ account at Hotmail or Yahoo!

Whenever you post on a message board, sign-up for an offer, or are asked to give out your email, use this dummy account.

Never use your main email address in such a manner, especially on a message board.

Many people try to “disguise” their emails while posting on a message board, under the false assumption a spam bot won’t grab this email.

As an example:

john @ myemailaccount.com
johnATmyemailaccountDotcom

The enemy has now programmed their spamming software to recognize these disguised emails.

Step 3: Use a contact form on your Website

This is a critical step. So listen closely.

Many savvy Webmasters use contact forms to prevent spam. However, it has to be done correctly to be effective.

If you have your email address ANYWHERE within your HTML, the new spamming software will find it.

You can’t use HTML encryption to hide your address, like you could in the past. The enemy has created new software that breaks down this code and grabs your email.

Many contact forms require you to use your email address to send the form information. BIG MISTAKE.

The spam bots will grab any email address in your HTML, even if it is in your contact form.

Your CGI script should contain the response email address - it should not be in the HTML.

When you are creating your contact form, use the “Mail-To-Form” script found here:

http://scripts.cgi101.com/

Step 4: Make a graphic of your email address

If you must have your actual email on your site, create a small image of your email address.

Then link this graphic to your contact form.

Now your customers can write down your actual email address and contact you at a later date.

The war rages on against spam, but by using these guerilla warfare tactics against spammers, you will soon achieve your FREEDOM!